Al Mirage - Sounds like a porn star.

Hi,

This venue has often intrigued me because it looks reet swank and has a massive plasma screen on the wall. So on saturday nights I walk past and see people eating a curry and watching Match of the Day. Which seems like an eminently sensible combination of resources. Likewise, when I see England playing India in the cricket and people are sat watching over their jalfrezi. What a brilliant concept! I liked the cut of this curry houses' jib already.

(Edit - just found it has a webiste as well. Winner. http://www.al-mirage.co.uk/index.html
The final paragraph in the about us section made me chuckle. Tooting is the new Milan! Fair play for the website though. Need to check for these more.)

Present were:

Berry7.
Big Dunc.
Spice Jet farmer.
Lurch.
Desmond.
Nick.
Matt + missus.
Steedane.
Jag

For a midweek get together this was a good effort! We rocked in and were offered the £12 eat all you can type deal. Actually I think you were limited to one starter and main course but it would clearly be enough and it included drinks. Alcohol is banned though so you couldn't abuse this deal to get drunk. It was mango lassis all round. We declined the deal because we wanted to see how the bill fared, a la carte. Bring it on please.

The poppadoms were swift and the dips already laid out. We were soon clattering through hearty mango chutney and mint condiments but we were all pleasantly surprised by the cherry dip. Was it a chutney? Can't really remember but it was something I'd never had before. Marks for originality. The starters came after with chicken tikka, onion bhajia, chilli paneer, some fish and kebab. The bhajia came first and it was seriously tasty. Hopes were high after this. It had loads of flavour and the onion was nicely cooked. We sensed a good venue.

Sadly though this was possibly the high point of the meal. The kebab was spicy and enjoyable, the tikka not bad, the fish was pretty bland and rather like the deep fried fare out of a pub and the chilli paneer lacked any real flavour. The cheese itself was excellent but the sauce was "like a campbell's tomato soup." Quote of one of the TCC sat near me. It really was a bit disappointing.

In between the starters I checked out the toilets, which were sparkling, and then returned back downstairs, in the disabled lift. This looked like something out of 2001: A Space Odyssey. Quite brilliant and it took me a lot of bravery to use it for some reason. Possibly the personal highlight of the night.

The mains then came and we had a large selection to get through, due to the number of attendees. Fish masala, chicken methi, chicken tava, chicken jalfrezi, balti methi lamb, tropical lamb, gutarati lamb and lamb tikka jalfrezi rolled out towards us. Accompanied by rice and naans, this was looking pretty massive! The mains were ok and at times I enjoyed sampling the ones I had not had before but something was lacking. Someone said it was like they used a stock base for all the sauces and adapted them slightly without real ingenuity. Campbell's tomato soup was noticeable a couple of times and no matter how hard I tried to feel some sort of love for the food there wasn't a huge amount I could muster. They were all fine, don't get me wrong, but they didn't excite me. The naans were not bad, again, but nothing amazing and the keema naan was like eating a brick. It all got a bit hard going at the end.

Big Dunc achieved some hero status by polishing off ALL the left overs, which was a horrible amount. It takes quite a lot to impress simple people like ourselves but this was a display of eating not to be ignored. I actually thought he might die. Good work big man. (Edit: See below for an action shot. He looks like a yank in one of those eating contests. )

So, onto the scores.

The place - 8 out of 10. It rocked. Spiral staircase, disabled lift, cctv, massive plasma screen, clean as you like and glittering toilets (in a good way like). This was a great venue. I wanted to give it 9 for the plasma screen alone but I was shouted down. As curry houses go, a good venue nonetheless.

The Service - 7 out of 10. Quick and efficient and with no messing about, the waiters looked after us really well. Slightly marked down because they recommended the fish starter and it was pretty bland and our order was wrong on the mains. Now, he had read it back to us but only to one guy at the end of the table and when it transpired that one dish was wrong, we got a bit of a moody look, as if we should just get on with it. We weren't being difficult, we just wanted it corrected. Never good to feel guilty about these things. On the whole though the service was good and the waiters chatty.

Starters and Sundries - 6 out of 10. A bit disappointing but buoyed by the cherry dip and onion bhajia. Overall the starters just didn't excite and the sundries were a little average. Nothing terrible but nothing amazing either.

Curry - 5.5 out of 10. Even less inspiring than the starters. It just lacked any real bite or flavour and whilst the tropical lamb or the fish were nice, most of the dishes lacked any real excitement. I just expected a bit better to be honest. It's hard to explain but all of us came away feeling it just about did the job. Nothing more.

Value for Money - 6 out of 10. The bill came out at about £12 a head so the deal looks spot on really. They had obviously done their maths. Whilst this wasn't expensive as such, given the mango lassis and array of naans, for pure value it lost out. For that amount of money you could do better I think and value does not equate directly to cheapness. Again you may be paying for the venue.

Total - 32.5 out of 50. A kind of nothing mark really. Above average in that it didn't end up as a 25 or less but just a bit disappointing. Nothing left me feeling like the venue had done something special but similarly it did nothing terrible. It was all of a good enough standard but nothing more. I think if you strolled in off the street that you'd be contented when you left but maybe not impressed. The venue is great and the spiral staircase and tv make it worth the visit in my book. But it's not actual curry is it!?

The happy meal was:

Tarka Dall - £2.95
Plain Rice - £1.50
Plain Naan - 60p
Sweet Lassi - £1.40

Total - £6.45. Pretty cheap in fairness.

So I think this place has a place in Tooting's array of curry vendors. I think this would be my choice if it was saturday night and I'm coming back from the pub or the football and I want to eat and watch Match of the Day with my mates. Or maybe the cricket was on and you could go along and get involved and have some banter with the staff. Sadly though you cannot drink here which kind of undermines that concept of merry sports viewing. As a venue though it is not bad but when placed in between Lahore and Mirch Masala, you have to wonder if it gets much business for anything other than its decor.

Berry7

Lahori Spice Village - more of a hamlet actually.

Greetings,

So we embarked on our first midweek meeting, with a routine pint at the Selkirk. I think hopes were kind of high for this venue because it always seemed very busy, whenever any of us had gone past it. An active venue seems to call out to you to try it, so I'd been looking forward to this one. Plus it had the look of a tiny canteen which always amuses me. So we were good to go.

Attendees:

Berry7.
Spice Jet Farmer.
Desmond.
Big Dunc.
Paulo.
Matt (non Ozzie)

The "Strictly no alcohol" sign on the door brought immediate disappointment but after a brief discussion, we accepted this and went on in. Greeted immediately, we were sat at a table where the dips were already awaiting our feeding frenzy and poppadoms were forthcoming. This was more like it! Batter me with me food the moment I arrive, please.

This introduction was very pleasing and the waiter took our drink order quickly as well. Mango lassis all round then. The poppadoms were very good and the dips refilled heartily by the staff whilst our orders were taken for the starters. Everything was moving very quickly but not in a rushed way and soon we were all agreeing that this was the best service we'd seen yet. Would it continue?

The starters came out and we had chicken tikka, sheek kebab (I think) and vegetable samosas. The tikka was kind of strange, but in a good way, and the kebab was very pleasing as well. The samosas rounded off the starters nicely and we sat about impressed with everything put in front of us. We hadn't really had a chance to complain yet. As we sat there, random waiters scrubbed down the counters and tables and you got the impression that cleanliness was important here. Never a bad thing to see.

Then we ordered mains and here the service really got going. Our waiter, whom I think was the owner, chatted us through the realms of naan breads available and put up with all our questions about the various dishes. I'm not a curry expert so I'm trying to ask more and learn about the different foods and it's good when someone talks you through it. So engulfed were we by naan information that we, ok I, ordered a shed load ranging from keema to chill and garlic to jeera. I think we ordered 5 in some sort of dough frenzy as the waiter described different ones that we hadn't had before. It was all very exciting.

The mains came in good time and with a flurry of activity. Chicken jalfrezi, methi, dopiaza, mutton nihari, fish tikka masala, taka dal, bombay aloo and 47 different types of naan. In true TCC style the mains were passed round for judging and the consensus was positive. They continued where the starters left off and we all ploughed in like we hadn't eaten for days. We had enough naan to build a raft and float down the Thames.

So, onto the scores.

The place - 6 out of 10. It's not flash and it's not going to impress anyone but it is clean and intimate. It is just another canteen style venue in this sense but it does the job fine. Special mention for the gas meter in the men's toilet which looks like it might fall of at any given moment onto your head. Worth the entrance fee alone.

The Service - 9 out of 10. Right here is why this place stands out from the crowd. We may have been lucky because it was mid week, and I think we got the owner, but the attention throughout the meal, from everyone, was second to none. Dips were refilled without asking, drinks were brought quickly, dishes were explained and naans recommended. It's not that hard to do which makes you wonder why it feels so rare to find a place that can. Great stuff.

Starters and Sundries - 8 out of 10. Good all round score here. The poppadoms were brought swiftly and the dips attended to twice I think. Good chunky chutney and a good touch of spice in the chilli sauce. The startes were tasty and the naans were varied and of a good size. The keema naan and chilli naan were my favourites.

Curry - 7 out of 10. Good portion sizes and lots of flavour. I think I tried all the dishes and all were of a decent standard. The ghee content (fat) was slightly high if you were going to be honest but this didn't affect the enjoyment of the meal. They were by no means incredible and weren't up to Lahore's standard but they were still good. I particularly enjoyed the fish but then I always do. The Nihari was also very different and something I hadn't had before.

Value for Money - 8 out of 10.

The bill came to £60.30 for the 6 of us. However we did order drinks which aren't normally factored into the bill as we normally bring our own. So this needs to be taken into account. I think the drinks were about £7. So with a tip, drinks and eating more naan than is advisable the cost was £11 each. Given the food and drink bonanza, we all felt this was very good value for money. I think we pushed the bill up with our eagerness and greed.

Total - 38 out of 50.

This came out equal with Lahore. Which is a big statement. And here you enter the realm of what makes a good night at the curry house. If you factor in only the curry and starters etc then Lahore is a tough benchmark to beat but Lahori Spice Village upped its game with its service. This really fired its score up and allowed it to compete with the more established brands on the high street. We all came away pretty impressed by this and accepted that it deserved to be joint with Lahore on it s all round showing. If you want amazing curry then go to Lahore. But equally go to Lahori Spice Village for a good all round experience. And for the gas meter. Maybe we caught the owner on a good night or maybe it is easier to be attentive on a quieter evening but it was still quite busy and you can only judge on what you see and experience.

The Happy Meal came out at a good price.

Tarka Dall - £3.50

Plain Rice - £1.50

Plain Naan - 60p

Sweet Lassi - £1.50

Total - £7.10. A bit more than Lahore but in the same area. Makes you see the price increase of Masaledar's plush surroundings. But some people will like that so choice is good.

The only slight reservation I'd now make in hindsight is that I got a bit ill after the visit here. Dunc, with his cast iron stomach, also felt a bit under the weather on his cycle home. I am not convinced either of us can point a finger at the venue but we did say we'd list anything that came up as a footnote. Even more reason to go back and check it out again. So we will.

Hope that clears up for Russ why I took so long to post. You weren't far off in your guess as it goes. Again I'd like to say that I'm not implying the food made me ill but that we will file it away under "review again". I see Ash Aktar has posted a comment on this blog as well. Welcome. Feedback always appreciated.

The highlight of this whole visit though was Paul snatching a TCC business card off me at the end and slipping it in with the bill and the money we had left. Be interesting to see if anyone ever comes on here to berate us. Time will tell.

Berry7.