We ventured across to Masaledar last Friday to sample their wares and check out the fit waitress. See link.
http://www.london-eating.co.uk/3005.htm
This contained some of the funniest reviews ever written. It seems this place would either blow us away or be a total disaster. Deep down I was hoping it would be a disaster. I'm still awaiting a car crash evening spent spooning mounds of veggy glop into my rubber naan. Why I don't know. Maybe being English means I secretly yearn for misery. Maybe I'm just a fool.
Present were:
Berry7
Spice Jet Farmer
Big Dunc
Desmond
Plus Guests...
Farmer's surprisingly nice and non ape-like missus Lauren.
Richard
Chloe
Ben (a bad drunk it seems)
Elle
Vicky
Anyhow, we stumbled into Masaledar after a couple at the Selkirk and waited around like idiots for about 2 minutes before anyone could be bothered to acknowledge us. It was so ridiculous that the chef looked embarrassed and went off to find someone for us. It's not hard to smile and tell people to give you two minutes is it? Apparently it is.
So they moved us out back into the most bizarrely decorated curry house EVER and then we took our seats. The decor looked like a mix between chic interior design and a mentalist on acid. The chairs were wrought iron and bright red and the walls a strange brown with minimalist pictures hanging on them. Odd but fair play for effort. I quite liked it. It beats your average curry house in Tooting, hands down.
The service remained terrible, although always polite and helpful when it came and after much looking around and wondering what was happening, we got our starters. But before our poppadoms. Seriously. How on earth? By this point we were all clutching our heads. The starters were quite good with the kebab being pretty tasty although the description of "canteen burger with amazing spices" did kind of sum it up. The spring roll was enjoyable with spinach and paneer but spring roll? Why exactly? The onion bhajis were average at best and the yoghurt was fizzy! Don't ask but it was fizzy!
Then the mains came, after another elongated wait, which was fine as we topped up on Cobra, and jabbered incessantly about the TCC with our guests, who seemed to be enjoying the concept. I stopped taking notes at this point because I was a bit pissed and it wasn't really worth it. I was already writing the place off. Then, in a bizarre turnaround involving Lazarus and a sprinkle of cumin, the kitchen provided some quite excellent main courses. I didn't write them down because I was too busy eating but I went with the fish masala, a chicken jalfrezi, chicken methi and other usuals were ordered plus a variety of lamb and vegetarian dishes. The mains were really pretty good and we all tucked into each other's dishes with glee. The night finally took off and people were doing the vital part of a curry night which is saying "ooh you must try this lamb" or "have you tasted the fish?" and everyone mucking in. At last Masaledar came to life. But was it too late?
So onto the scores.
The place - 7 out of 10. I liked it. We all did. They'd put loads of effort in to make this somewhere different from the plethora of canteens down the high street. The seats were big and comfortable and the decor was chilled. There was a distinct lack of atmosphere though and it did feel a bit like you were just stuck out the back where we were. But it was a nice change.
The Service - 3 out of 10. Good. God. They were friendly and helpful and so on but really. The service was so bad that I managed to make a 3 skin joint at the table with hash and no one even came close to noticing. It took me about 5 drunken minutes to do. They would be gone for ages before even popping their heads back in and even then it was hard to get their attention. Poppadoms after starters was quite inspired. Even the waiter looked shocked at that one.
Starters and Sundries - 6 out of 10. Some were pretty good, others a bit bland. The food in fairness pulled this place up because the starters did get everyone chatting about the food and its relative qualities whereas before were just laughing at the service. Not bad at all.
Curry - 7 out of 10. The mains were tasty and deserve some credit. We had a range of dishes and each one (apart from the kidney bean curry which seemed like a good idea at the time) had a good amount of flavour and spice. I did really enjoy the mains but people felt after an 8.5 for Lahore that this only warranted a 7. Good, strong curry though.
Value for Money - 5 out of 10. Some said 6 but overall the "locals" said 5. The bill came to £12 each with tip which is a fair increase on last week for not as much value. I think you are paying a bit for the decor here, which is fair enough. You would want to take my sister here and not Lahore and pay more to shut her up. Personally I'd rather pay less and have the better curry and try and shut out her nagging tones as I eat my chicken tikka starter.
Total - 28 out of 50. Thinks it's all been covered. It just let itself down when it could have easily scored well. The decor is there and with a bit of attention and hospitality then the place would do well. They need to dedicate people to the back area and not leave them out to dry and just up the effort a bit. The starters could be a bit more inventive and the poppadoms come with some chutney and so on rather than just fizzing yoghurt. A few simple touches would really pick this place up. It does have the nicest surroundings I've seen, if you're bothered by that sort of thing so it may well do well on that alone.
The Happy Meal came out more expensive than Lahore.
Tarka Dall - £4.25
Plain Rice - £2.25
Plain Naan - 90p
Sweet Lassi - £1.95.
Total - £9.35.
Pretty steep really.
Lahore sits untouched after one week then. Rightly so. Not sure about a venue this week. Might go on Monday night to somewhere quite canteen like and test the water of some of the smaller, lesser known venues. Friday was a good night and our guests enjoyed themselves but I think there are better to be found venues in our quest. I made it to bed around 3am this time I think after Bad Drunk Ben removed himself from my front room. I suspect it may not be the last I see of him on these nights.
In other news our business cards are on their way! Excellent.
Berry7.
6 comments:
Hmmm. Pedant point coming up.
You say that it "beats your average curry house in Tooting, hands down" when describing the decor. However, having only reviewed Lahore thus far, you could hardly claim to be taking a representative sample, could you? How do you know that all of the other curry houses in Tooting aren't Guggenheim-esque palaces of artistry not seen anywhere else this side of the Taj Mahal? (The real one, not the one in Walthamstow High Street.)
I think that if you're to achieve you're aim of being the definitive source of knowledge on curry houses in Tooting, you need to be a little more considered in your descriptions. AA Gill would not be impressed.
Like the use of skinning up as a relative factor of service. Perhaps you could introduce that as a regular measurement of speed of service?
"Halfway through mix before waiter observed me building joint. Average."
"Barely finished sticking skins together as I was being thrown out the door. Highly attentive service."
The second half of your post made me laugh. A lot. The first half was just white noise.
But seeing as you're the only person who comments I have to tread carefully.
With regards to the decor point, my implication was that any chump who walks from Tooting Bec to Broadway will see a range of very average looking eateries. It was a general point, based on the fact that I often walk round the area with my eyes open. It's good. You should try it.
Perhaps I should have qualified it but then I remembered that what little life I have left needs to be preserved. You freak.
Everyone keeps talking about AA Gill. I don't know who he is. Apparently he's nicked my idea or something.
Still chuckling at your final two descriptions.
In other news my business cards still haven't turned up! Do they not know how important this.
Tomorrow the TCC is going to Lahori Spice Village. It looks distinctly plainfor the outside in a canteen style but is always heaving. Either the owner has a massive family or the food is good. We'll let you know.
Today is the 7th of September. No report on Lahori Spice Village.
Unless it has given you gastroenteritis, then you are letting down your public.
Very disappointed in you.
God knows that Lahore Karahi is the best Curry House this side of London. Fact. It don't look great - but then, none of the best curry houses (See Southall and Drummond Street for proof) do. If they look good (like that poncy Masaledar) - they're just overpriced and overcooked. It was sad to see Sakonis go but that lovely vegetarian restaurant up that end (name escapes me) do a marvellous Tomato Curry. A tomato curry! Sounds dull and boring - but it's lush.
Hello Ash Akhtar. Cheers for your comments. Find me the name of that restaurant and we might make it the next venue. And tomato curry will be on the menu!
Hello - sorry it's taken so long to reply.
The restaurant's name is Kastoori - though you may well have been there by now.
Tis good. You will like!
;D
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